someone please save us, us college kids!
  what my parents told me is what i did
  they said go to school and be a college kid
  but in the end i question why i did
    i'm poor, i'm starving, i'm flat broke, i've got no cash to spend
  sell all my books for front row tickets to dave matthews band
  my girlfriend's at another school, i know this year will test her
  i called, found out she had three other boyfriends last semester
    and that's why i say
  oh no! not for me, not for me
  call it torture, call it university
  no! arts and crafts is all i need
  i'll take calligraphy and then i'll make a fake degree
    80 grand later i found out that all that i had learned
  is that you should show up to take your finals and your midterms
  the party scene is kinda mean, i think it's sick and twisted
  the navy showed up at my dorm and claimed that i enlisted
    and that's why i say
  oh no! not for me, not for me
  call it torture, call it university
  no! arts and crafts is all i need
  i'll take calligraphy and then i'll make a fake degree
    don't get excited. she'll say "no" without a doubt you see
  and i've decided college girls just won't go out with me
  they make me nervous and they always catch me off my guard
  like cell phone services i drop out cause college is too hard
    it's time to call my father
  cause it's his alma mater
  good grades aren't what they seem
  i think he knows the dean
  it's time to call my father
  cause it's his alma mater
  he says he's proud of me
  but college always was his dream
  and i would always say it's not for me
    oh no! not for me, not for me
  call it torture, call it university
  no! arts and crafts is all i need
  i'll take calligraphy and then i'll make a fake degree
    someone please save us, us college kids!
  what my parents told me is what i did
  they said go to school and be a college kid
  but in the end i question why i did
    do what will make you happy
  do what you feel is right
  only but one thing matters
  learn how to live your life
    [in background:]
  (phi, beta, delta, cappa
  someone please save us, us college kids!
  what my parents told me is what i did
  they said go to school and be a college kid
  but in the end i question why i did)
    do what will make God happy
  do what you feel is right
  only but one thing matters
  learn how to live your life