Don't want to be Sylvester Stallone - don't push me
  Nev-ever gonna star in "Home Alone"
  Hamlet, MacBeth, I'm crazy for King Lear
  There's nothing more exciting than reciting Shakespeare
    [Chorus]
  Fred Olivier, to be or not to be
  Fred Olivier, all for my equity
    Don't want to go to Hollywood
  I sit alone and play the wood
  I quoth Othello and I feel wick
  I'm the only one who understands what I speak
    [Chorus]
  [Guitar Bit]
    I tread the boards till it make me scream
  But it was only a Midsummer Nights Dream,
  There's more to life than a Shakespearean clone
  All I want is fame and fortune
    [Chorus]